Smaggle Style

I do love a bit of Betsey. Her ready-to-wear Fall 2008 collection makes me love her even more. The look is slightly trashy and very vintage with unexpected lines and versatility through out the collection. I get so bored when designers pick a fabric and repeat the same dress 10 times with slightly different shapes. Yawn. Not the case with Ms Johnson. Each of her outfits has an individual personality, much like the characters out of Rent - waif like band groupies who do drugs and steal but you love them anyway because they are so fabulous and tortured. The kind of girl who carries a massive bag everywhere because she is homeless and all the clothes she wears are borrowed or stolen yet she still manages to look like she fell straight off the catwalk and into a bar. Her make up is flawless, her diet consists of champagne and cigarettes and she is stuck in an abusive relationship with a guy she is in love with. Oh and she has a hidden talent like singing or painting that she either lives to pursue or halucinates about while dying from an overdose. Her life is made all the more fascinating because the girl you love to hate is wearing red lipstick, a beret, platform shoes, blue nail polish and fishnet stockings…   

Here are a few covetable items to assist you in the pursuit of the ‘Bad girl with a heart of gold’ look…

* Blue nail polish - It makes you look a little like a corpse but lets face it, it’s the kind of the look we are aiming for here.

* Fish net, polka dot or lace stockings. They give the appearance of nakedness and they never cease to make an outfit look naughty.

* Fringing. Perfect for swirling on the dance floor or strutting down the street in your platforms.

* Crimped hair. Am I the only person who still thinks this is cool? If I had straight hair I would do this every day.

* An unexpected accessory. A beret, a man’s watch, a scarf tied around your waist. You want to make it look like you just stole it from somebody else. You know because you’re just so crazy like that…

* Platform shoes. None of this stiletto crap. You need the extra stability for your slow motion running scene.

* A piece of sentimental jewellery like a locket or a ring that you wear all the time and you get misty eyed and elusive whenever someone asks you about it.

I’m breaking out the blue polish this week…

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

There is certainly something about Alice In Wonderland. It’s this certain something that makes you want to drink poison because the bottle tells you not you, that makes you try and squeeze into tiny crevasse’s that you won’t fit through and that makes you jump off a roof wearing a circle skirt because you hope the wind will catch underneath and you’ll glide softly to the ground as if you were floating under Mary Poppins’ umbrella. Well my darlings have I got a treat for you! The far less stupid (and possibly fatal) way of embracing the land of wonder is simply to don white tights like our young Alice. How she managed to party with Tweedle twins and make it through the Mad Hatter’s tea party with out so much as a smudge on her snowy white tights I’ll never know, but she sure did look sweet while doing it.

I’ll admit it wasn’t just Alice that made me all white-tight happy. I’m pointing the finger at McQueen again. His 2008 Ready to Wear Fall collection is delicious. All icy furs, gold trimmings and sparkly embroidery. And lets not forget those gorgeous white legs…

Sigh! I’m going to get white tights and carry muffins in a basket…

Love Lady Smaggle

Photos from Style.com

 * Match the colour of your handbag to your shoes and belt. How quaint.

* Wear Chanel No. 5 - the signature fragrance of Marilyn Monroe created in 1921. She wore it to bed… and nothing else.

* Drink whisky with ice and paint your fingernails and lips blood red.

* Wear as many bangles that will fit on your wrist and carry a clutch bag. A delicious beaded one with nothing more than a lipstick inside.

* Wear lingerie in gelati colours with little fruity garters.

* Discover Egypt. Tutankhamen was the subject of fashion fascination and his head adorned many a clutch bag in the 20’s.

* Use rouge.

* Buy your man a cape and have him wrap it around you on chilly street light-lit nights.

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

Dear Readers,

There is something about scarves that you should know. It may not have been evident due to the careful editing of my How to Wear a Scarf - Part 1 post but if you wish to become a true inspiration to the scarf wearing clan I’m about to tell you something that could potentially change your life. And take you to an expert level of scarf wearing. Ready? You don’t have to wear a scarf around your neck. It’s shocking, I know. For the next installment of How to Wear a Scarf we’re going to get a little kooky, a little weird… a little experimental.

Why not try beautiful clean make up with a scarf around your head? Make sure you show a little hair to avoid that widow look.

I’m sorry but the coolness of this is ASTOUNDING - Wear your scarf UNDERNEATH your jacket with artistic fringes peeking through the neck and hem.

Wear two scarves at once! One up high in a bow and longer one tied down low. That’s poetry. Oh and if you could be as cute as this girl that would be good.

My new obsession. A short scarf and a necklace. It’s much easier to pull this off if you’re French.

And again! Only this time it’s Paraphernalia. I have this necklace in red and I love it. I fully intend on wearing it with a scarf sometime in the near future. And cutting my hair into a blunt bob.

Why not wear your scarf like a hood? With a devilishly shaggy fringe?

Bunch your scarf up like a roll neck jumper and wear it with a mega collar. On a bike. With a basket holding a French bread stick and a bunch of wild flowers. Okay so I may have analysed that one a little too much…

Okay. Can everyone please promise that in the next week you will wear a scarf tied in a bow on your head? You will be depriving the world of serious amounts of cuteness if you don’t.

A big arse neck bow. How delightful.

Don’t even get me started on the structural brilliance of this. Not only is the head piece INSANELY AWSOME she is also wearing one of the most beautiful scarves I’ve ever seen. Multiple scarves. Why the hell didn’t I think of that? Photos from Facehunter.

Oh and I was trawling through Style Bytes (surprise, surprise) and I know poor Agathe must think I am a stalker but she is quite simply an amazing style icon. And her scarf wearing skills are truly extraordinary. Barely a day goes by when this sartorial delight doesn’t don a scarf and although she is conservative in her placement of this accessory (usually around her neck) the style, structure and colour of her scarves is a visual phenomenon.  

 Go forth and conquer my little Scarfy MrScarfersons!

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

I have to say that I was quite shocked to discover how many fabulous images I managed to find of men wearing scarves for my How to Wear a Scarf - For Men post. Who knew there were so many men I would shag wandering aimlessly around London? There were even more women! Wearing scarves I mean, not women I would shag.

Here is the pick o’ the litter…

I love a silk scarf tied around like a roll-neck. And the pattern and colours give it an unusual twist.

I strongly believe that shawls are in the scarf family. Or scarves are in the shawl family. I don’t know which one but there is some serious in-breeding going on there. Anyway how beautiful is this girl? A shawl with serious fringe doesn’t look at all Nanna-like when paired with a funky haircut and a dapper little beret.

Skinny scarves are too cool. I like to wear them and drink Frappucinos and pretend that I am Kate Hudson.

Always play with texture. Okay the jumper is a little scary but the scarf is divine.

Wear a red scarf with red lipstick. Seriously just do it.

A loose extra long scarf gives snuggle-factor like nothing else. Only attempt this look if you want people to cuddle you excessively.

A fur stole with big-arse bow. Need. This. Now.

I don’t know if this is technically a scarf or just some fur pompoms on a ribbon. Lets just call it the Pommy Ribbonator (distant cousin of the scarf… It may have had some babies with a necklace and a rabbit) and admit that it’s rad. Is anyone feeling a DIY kind of thing here?

Block colour is splendid. Lined with black and thrown over a leather jacket is just scarf heaven wouldn’t you say?

Casual plaid with matching heels. How quaint!

A casual designer scarf slung around your neck and blowing in the breeze. Oh yeah.

A red scarf with straight black. An afro is preferable but not compulsory.

A marshmallow fluff shawl with a pink headband. Why don’t we all own these?

Stock up on scarves! They are the cheapest and most over looked item at nearly all thrift stores. And here is a kooky tip for you - wear them around your neck. So many people wear them as headscarves that it’s scary but a silky number tied around your neck is SO COOL that it’s practically frozen. Lame metaphor, I know but I needed to get my point across somehow…

 Stay tuned for more scarf-y goodness…

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

Two of my delightful male readers sent out a cry for help. They need tips on how to wear scarves. Okay I know what my American readers are thinking. It’s February. Shouldn’t we Aussies all be wearing shorts and cooking shrimps on the barbie? Well my friends this is not possible when you live in the shit-for-brains city that I live in. I’ve been wearing tights for weeks and it’s not even officially Autumn yet. I bought a brand new pair of swimmers 3 months ago that have not seen the light of day. Sunburnt country my arse. Anyway I’ve been gathering some info on scarf wearing and since it was boys that asked me first I’m starting with boys! Stay tuned ladies I’ve got female scarves coming your way soon!

Lets start with some photos of boys who ‘do good scarf’.

The tassels are porn. Look how they match the belt. And paisley with plaid? Who could ever have dreamed of anything so glorious?

I’m not sure if this is a scarf but the point is that should be. Strips of stiff black satin artisically drapped over a tuxedo jacket. Who says you can’t accessorise a suit?

A gorgeous chunky knit scarf wrapped thickly around the neck. Extra points if it’s a quirky colour. More points if you’re as cute as a button like this sweet lad.

The traditional through-the-loop style but twisted to the side. Simple but funky.

Casual paisley on a man. Swoon.

A skinny cotton knotted scarf looks beautiful. Especially worn with neutrals and melt-in-your-mouth chocolate skin.

A quirky little silk scarf tied in a cowboy style. Makes you want to ride bareback through the mountains doesn’t it?

I like the concept of this but the colour is a little Miami Vice. But a thin strip of appropriately coloured satin could look delicious.

A big, long, snuggly scarf. Looks great with a Mohawk.

I love scarves that play with texture and shape. This has a very organic feel to it, like he didn’t think twice about wearing it in public. A modern day Dorian Grey. 

A thin mottled grey number. Wind machine optional.

A do love an assymetrical twist.

I love grey scarves. Especially knotted ones worn with red striped hoodies. On boys who look like Chris Martin from Cold Play.

Here are a few tips to think about when ‘doing scarf’…

* There are HUNDREDS of different kinds of scarves around. If you keep buying the same kind you’re going to look the same. Buy scarves that are long, short, wool, cotton, thick, tasselled, thin, satin, square, triangular. Build yourself a solid collection of scarves and WEAR THEM. Seriously there is nothing sexier than a scarf on a boy. If you like boys or girls or both a scarf is a primary tool in the quest to get laid.

* Buy colourful scarves. Inject a little light into your life! And pink IS NOT GAY. Just so you know. If you are really frightened of colour (like so many of my male friends are) buy a really beautiful, good quality grey scarf. There is seldom a more stylish gentleman than one that wears grey cashmere.

* Don’t be a pussy. Girl scarves are awesome. Just because they are marketed at girls doesn’t mean you can’t wear them. Scarves are uni-sex. Just like bathrooms in nightclubs and The Artist Formerly Known As Prince.

* It’s also okay to wear brooches with scarves. They help to keep the scarf in place. Brooches are another thing that ARE NOT GAY. They happen to be stylish and useful and you’re a douche if you don’t wear them.

Here are few sites with interesting scarf tying tips that are penis appropriate.

Mensflair

Askmen.com

Enzinearticles

Photos from Facehunter

For my darling gay husbands Matt & Ged. Hope this helps!

For all the ladies out there, stay tuned my pets… ladies scarf tips are coming to Smaggle soon!

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx 

 I do love the Oscars. But I must admit I’m usually over the whole thing after all the stars leave the red carpet and go into the theatre. No one I like ever wins and there is always really embarrassing performances. In general I found the dresses this year to be quite boring. There was the occasional gem but they were few and far between. Here is my Oscars bitch for 2008…

Rebecca Miller in Christian Lacroix - I adore this. I love the stripey shoes and the magenta hair. She is also Daniel Day Lewis’ lover. Could any woman be more glorious? I’m questioning Daniel Day Lewis’ shoe choice though. But with those cheekbones who the hell is looking at his feet?

Nicole Kidman in Balenciaga - Not a fan of this one I’m afraid. The necklace is rather spectacular but it blends into her ethereal skin and gets lost.

Anne Hathaway in Marchesa - Yuck. Why do nipple flowers? And why are her teeth so big? Why is she so annoying? Why?

Katherine Heigl in Escada - Of all of the thousands of Grecian one-shouldered dresses at the Oscars this year this one is my favourite. And it has nothing to do with my recent obsession with Grey’s Anatomy. Or my obsession with My Father The Hero. Okay fine! I love Katherine Heigl! Is that a crime?

Hilary Swank in Versace - Quite pleasant but a little tame. I’m rather enamoured of the rippled/pleated hem.

Helen Mirren in Georges Chakra - There was literally an audible gasp to be heard when I first laid eyes on Dame Helen Mirren. She is simply breathtaking. Always.

Ellen Page in Jean-Louis Scherrer Haute Couture - A little safe for an Oscar nominee but her performance in Juno more than makes up for her lack of sartorial experimentation. Plus she is adorable.

Diablo Cody in Christian Dior - Finally someone with a personality! Gold flats, leopard print and a massive tatt. Damn I love this girl. And her screen play rocks. 

Amy Adams in Proenza Schouler - There is NOTHING I love more than red heads who get how friggin awesome they look in green. Especially deep green.

So all in all it was rather a bit of a yawn wasn’t it? What did everyone else think? Too many one-shouldered dresses? Too many boobs squished into bandeaux? And when did everyone suddenly get too cool for bling? Where were all the Harry Winstons? And Bvlgaris? Come on people it’s the freaking Oscars! Gimme some damn diamonds!

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

Starting from now I’m going to stop saying that ‘I’m not much of a runway girl.’ It’s clearly a lie considering how long I spend on Style.com and how often I try to scab looks from designer shows. Anna Sui’s Fall 2008 Ready-to-Wear collection is STUNNING! Damn I love that girl…

Is anyone as excited as I am about the resurgence of PATTERNED TIGHTS? When I was about ten years old my auntie Janice gave me three pairs of patterned tights for my birthday. I had a mulit-coloured tye-died pair, a black pair with daisies all over them (my favourite) and an awesome black pair with spider webs on them. I literally wore them to death. In fact I believe that I wore the daisies underneath denim shorts. The coolness of me is astounding sometimes…

And remember about a week ago when I said that Princess Leia buns were a cute thing to wear? What about a Princess Leia head band? How elfin and other-worldly is this girl? I just want to fly to Saturn and frolic with her in a purple meadow and ride unicorns…

I’m off to find me some patterned tights! I really really really want some red and blue Japanese print ones to go with my bangles… wish me luck!

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx

It’s all in the accessories darling. Now I know when people think of Lacroix their minds immediately wander over to Ab Fab land where Patsy is snorting cocaine and Eddie keeps repeating ’It’s Lacroix sweetie…’ whilst wearing the ugliest outfit in all existence. And to the average person it is difficult to defend our dear Christian. But I adore him. I have said before that I am not much of a runway girl but when Style.com releases the catwalk looks of the season I head straight for the man who promotes the extreme. But how to get the decadent and unapologetic look of the Master of Clashers without looking like a clown? Turn your eyes towards the accoutrement to take this catwalk look to the street…

A red beaded rosary belt. How simply beautiful, timeless and controversial.

A jet black massive beaded pin. To close a cropped cardi, to pin to scarf, to devilishly clip on your shoe.

A delicious white neck ruff. The Queen of all accessories this season. Wear it with a black strapless dress. And nothing else but Chanel No. 5…

A long rope of delicate flowers thrown casually around the waist. Team with a long skirt and let your hips work it.

A red garland of flowers worn at the side of the head. Do add a bow. If you are going to O.T.T you might as well do it fabulously…

Love Lady Smaggle xxx

I know it’s a little early to be considering the wonderful season of Autumn but I’m the snuggliest person in the universe and I am hanging out to get back into my socks and tights. Here is a list of the things that I am coveting for Autumn this year…

* Over the knee or knee high socks

* Tights in every colour

* Black boots

* A long string of ivory coloured beads

* A rose garland necklace

* Vests

* A trench coat

* Converse All Stars

* A scarf/hood thingy (I think Diana Vreeland called them ’snoods’)

Here is Agathe from Style Bytes wearing one

I am going to go for a very layered come-frolic-with-me-in-the-daisy-filled-meadows kind of look this autumn…

Here are some ladies from Facehunter rocking the look

The white shirt and relaxed jeans are so casual and cool - I love it!

I adore coloured tights with Mary Janes. They make me want to click my heels and say ‘There’s no place like home!’

A delightfully floaty dress over tights and boots. I also love the severity of this girls hair. What a wonderful contradiction to the outfit.

Get twice the mileage out of your summer frocks by warming them up with toasty cardigans and scarfs.

Using black with purpose is so alluring. She’s not monotone at all, she is using all kinds of shapes and textures to get the most out of her black.

How about you? What are your Autumn cravings? Besides lasagne and red wine I mean…

Love Lady Smaggle

xxx